Foundations Of Grief

14 Episodes

Episode 6 : Grievers Don’t Need to be Fixed

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Episode Notes

Grievers Don't Need to be Fixed

Grievers and those around them can sometimes see grief as a problem to be solved. We may feel like we are broken and need fixing and those around us may feel like they need to fix us.

Do you feel broken, as if there is something wrong with you and it will not be right until you are fixed? Just because we feel broken as a result of the loss we have experienced does not mean that there is anything wrong with us. Overcoming the perspective of needing to be fixed is a big step in the grieving process and is critical to restoring hope for the future.

You may be thinking, What’s the matter with me? Why can’t I improve faster?  I will never be okay. Even if you feel broken, there is nothing wrong with you.  Your heart is breaking as a result of a devastating loss and that is understandable and appropriate. Where you are now and how you are feeling is most likely normal and common for what you have gone through, even though it might be concerning to you and others.

So I am going to say it again, You do not need to be fixed. You don’t have a shattered brain. You’ve got a shattered heart. You must grieve, and you may need support in doing so in a healthy manner.

We’re not going to try to fix you. We want to love you exactly where you are, to support and encourage you as you grieve and figure out how to integrate this heartbreaking loss into your life through active healthy grieving and time – in your time. 

You, my friend, must be heard. You need support. You must grieve.

STEPPING STONE:

If you feel,or sense others feel like you need to be fixed, how can you shift your thinking and how would that impact you?

How could that change your expectations of yourself and the grief journey?

REFLECTION:

Grievers don’t need to be fixed, they need to be heard and supported – and they need to grieve. That’s the only way to mend a broken heart.